Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Guilty Heartache?

I was feeling pretty much on top of the world after the marathon weekend, finally shaking the lingering flu, watching my KT accomplish a goal that at one time not only seemed impossible, but more importantly that she really had no penchant to do. Oh, how time and God's hand changes hearts and minds! I watched my "aging" (I say that loosely) Ron Burgundy complete his 10th marathon - he called me four times and even texted our youngest son during the race! I didn't see any of the elite athletes with their BlackBerries during the race, which may in part explain why they finished 3+ hours ahead of him. (That, and they train 210 miles a week, are 40 lb lighter, 35 years younger...)

So during this rare day off, I was catching up on my feed reader, and read Angie's post for today, recognizing tomorrow as National Day of Remembrance for pregnancy and infant loss. Some of the comments left on her post are simply cutting to my very core. Is it right for me to feel so good when others are so deeply hurting? Why does God dole out such pain to some and not others? Does He truly need to put so many of us "in our place" in order to get His job done? I know many people who have been brought to their knees finding God and praying for the very first time because of tragedy - is that what it really takes for some? Apparently He knows better than I, and I certainly know that He's given me some pretty grave reasons to seek Him. He also knows it takes very little to bring myself to Him in prayer - good or bad. He takes us on journeys we can only understand through faith. And that's what sometimes makes pain a beautiful thing. He knows the plan, because He wrote the plan.

I'd like to think everyone would reach out to God on a glorious sunny day in Chicago after a victory, just as easily and eagerly as they do during those rock-bottom, heart-breaking times.

Through it all, He is always the same. He has proven that over and over again.

Tea tonight: Tazo Green with Ginger

1 comment:

The Bagley Bunch said...

Oh my goodness girl! That is HILARIOUS about the "leg" wound "not me"!!! I am an ultrasound tech so I can appreciate the "odd looks" etc. Haha--too funny. I will be back to check in on next week :). Thanks for checking out our blog

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